What you don't know is that the ache of grief is so all encompassing that it is a greater physical pain than you have ever or will ever experience - to the extent that it leaves you gasping for breath.
What you don't know is that anguish embraces you in your sleep and yet in waking the void threatens to swallow you up over - and over again.
What you don't know is that when the rest of the world return to normal: the meals stop coming, the phone stops ringing and the dirt has settled over the grave, that is when the grief is most unbearable,
What they don't tell you is that; there is no prescribed way of surviving it - although the stages of grief are real and you will go through them, in no particular order, for any length of time and in all manner of repeated fashion.
What you don't know is that people; out of love and concern, will end up saying hurtful things in ignorance simply because they feel the need to say something.
What you don't know is that grief overwhelms you when you don't expect it, plan for it or want it.
What you don't know is that the journey is a very lonely one that you cannot avoid - despite every effort to delay or deny it.
What they don't tell you is that you can only go through it, by going through it.
What they don't tell you is that the passage of time does not heal the pain but it does allow you to cope with it to the point that you are able to laugh again.
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